"Life is full of difficulties, some minor and others of a more serious nature. There seems to be an unending supply of challenges for one and all. Our problem is that we often expect instantaneous solutions to such challenges, forgetting that frequently the heavenly virtue of patience is required." -President Thomas S. Monson
"Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid." - John 14:27
As many of you may know, this past November I intentionally overdosed on Tylenol and some other random pills. I have struggled with anxiety and depression most of my life. I was going through some difficult times and I decided I didn't want to live with the trials anymore. I went to one of my favorite places where I usually go to try and feel peace. I then took the pills with half a bottle of cough syrup.
I don't really remember much about that day. I had written a text to my counselor, bishop, and stake president that I had intended to send when I thought it would be too late. I must have sent it because I vaguely remember answering a phone call from my stake president asking me where I was and to stay there because he had help coming. I kind of remember wondering why he sounded like he was crying. I sort of remember getting in the ambulance but that is about it.
This all happened on a Friday morning. The next thing I recall was waking up in ICU and it was Saturday. My first thought was how did I get here and then as I remembered I felt disappointment that I had not succeeded.
Since that day I have had a lot of ups and downs. I still have a long way to go to overcome this adversity in my life. I have been seeing my doctor and counselor on a regular basis. I am also seeking help from my church leaders. I am trying each day to trust in the Lord. I know if I can have enough faith I can overcome anything through the Atonement of my Savior, Jesus Christ.
Today is a good day overall. I have a headache and can't talk very well due to a cold and sinus infection, but the feelings of depression and anxiety are small. I won't guarantee that every post will be positive. I also will try not to post a lot of negative. The main reason I am starting this is for my own benefit. If I can help someone else in return, all the better.
Thanks for reading!